Stole this idea from the koko himself! Hope you don't mind Jarod =) Read all about it here
Dearest Younger Me,
One song, I have but one song,
One song only for you
One heart, tenderly beating
Ever entreating, constant and true....
It brings back memories, doesn't it? I remember the very first time we heard that song, and since then its been forever engraved in our heads. After 10 years since listening to that song, I still sing it from time to time. I guess this part of us will never change, no matter how old we get.
But such is life. It forces you to grow wiser, and there are so many things that I wish that I can share with you, so that you can do things right this time. But I know how you are like. You are adamant about making your own mistakes. But praise be to God, they're not too serious, yet. And I know you. Once you've made the mistake, you would wish that you can just go back into the past and change it again.
But since I have had the pleasure of hindsight, please, take heed to what I am about to say.
Understand that marriage is a beautiful thing. It was created by God, and it was never meant to be horrible or sad. I know you know this, so hold on to it, and always believe that not everyone will have a sad ending. And even sad endings can be the beginning of happy endings. Some people will try to come and tell you that God doesn't really have a hand in it, because some of the loneliest people are married. So God doesn't really plan marriages. Don't listen to them. They have no idea what they're talking about. You have seen it for yourself. So don't be shaken up by statements like that.
And when I say "happy ending", it is not your wedding day. If your wedding day is the happiest day of your life then you are in big trouble. The happiest day of your life should come AFTER your wedding day. And there shouldn't be only ONE happy day, there should be so many happy days that you have lost count. It is not the dress or the hair or the bridesmaid or the cake. It is not even the ring. Those things do not buy happiness. No.
Some will then tell you that you need to set certain criteria or standards so that you can find happiness. You know what I mean. Things like: he must be good-looking, he must be older than me, he must be smart and intelligent, he must play the guitar (you used to be real adamant about this one), blah blah blah. Sure, these are good things. But let me tell you, at the end of the day, they don't really matter. Because good looks will wither away, and maturity does not equal age, and some people are academically smart but retards in everything else, and everybody can play the guitar if they put enough effort into learning it. And there are many other things that you can demand of a guy, but let me tell you, you only need 4 things: that he is a good guy, that he is a responsible guy, that he loves you, and that he loves God with all his heart.
Standards too low?
Let me tell you, in this whole wide world, there is probably only one who can fulfill all that. You only see what he portrays to the world, but only God knows his heart. And only God can turn his heart to see your beauty in the midst of your inadequacies. Only God knows his true nature. And only God can make him fall totally, deeply, whole-heartedly in love with you. All of the other things - NOT IMPORTANT, even the one about the guitar. Let it go. Ain't worth it.
Oh, and another thing. Pray. Pray. Pray. Pray. God is the strength of your heart. Pray.
By now you have probably met some bad ass characters, and you will meet more of those in the future. I know it hurts when your heart gets broken into pieces and promises go unfulfilled. It may seem like there are no good men around, but don't give up. You need to go on believing in the existence of good men, of men who love God and will love their wives and children. As long as God is still alive, He will stir the hearts of men to Himself. So don't give up. Don't lose hope. They're not all that bad =). And you'll meet some really good guys in the future too!
And now, let me tell you what happiness really is
Happiness is when you know that he's always going to be there, that even if you get so angry at him and scream at his face and tell him to get lost (which, you will discover, you actually have that kind of capacity towards anger), he's staying put and he's not leaving you. No matter how much you tell him to get lost, he's not going anywhere because he knows you. Its all just hormones and you being very melancholic. He loves you, so he's staying put. He might scream back, but he's staying put. Happiness is when both of you are serving God together and building His Kingdom, united under His banner. Happiness is when he is leading you closer to your Maker, and you are always encouraging him to look at the face of Jesus. You know you have happiness when he is sacrificing himself for God, for you and for your children; that nothing in this earth can compare to those three jewels, and I mean nothing. Happiness is when he loves you even though you're old, fat, wrinkly and cranky. Happiness is when he cares for you when you're sick and puking your guts out. Happiness is feeling his body close to your heart when you're too depressed to carry on. Happiness is knowing and having full assurance that he loves you, that he's staying, and he's not going anywhere, that he is putting God and his family first, that he's not going to have some other woman behind your back.
And there is one, final thing.
You will come to realize this for yourself one day: there are certain places in the heart that are just too deep, and only God can go there. This man might be the closest person to you, but it is nothing compared to the surpassing comfort of being close to Jesus. He doesn't really complete you. God does. Even though he may be an amazing guy, he is nothing compared to Jesus, and he knows that I'm sure. This man is your lover, your best friend, and the father of your children, but there are things that he will never understand, circumstances that he will never know, and memories that he will never discover. So then let God complete you. Plus, by being completed by God, you are more than able to love and honour him.
One love that has possessed me
One love, thrilling me through
One song, my heart keeps singing
Of one love only for you.
And you'll be fine. Don't worry. You worry too much. Stop it.
Signed,
Older Me
