hebrews 11:1
Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and being certain of what we do not seeDuring the last lifegroup that I attended, the topic was on the power of tongue. For the first time in my life I began to comprehend the power that lies in our words. Words can be used for creation and destruction, for love and for hatred. God created the world by speaking it into existence, and thus, words create. When a political leader decides to declare war against another for whatever reason, whether it was for vengence, independence, religion or to break free from suppression, the words of declaration destroys. When a couple decided to tie the knot before the altar, the words of their vows speak of love and eternal devotion. When backstabbing occurs, the words reveal hatred.And then I started thinking about the words that we say in our everyday lives, and how often our words often reflect lack of hope and full of despair. It was as if such words are the norm in society. When we ask students who are facing major exams the question "How did you do in the exam?", society taught them to say "Oh, it was really hard.", "I think I'm going to fail", "Please don't talk about it" etc., even though in reality, they did ok, or really well. When our hearts are hoping for something that seems possible and yet, not in sight, we always try to supress whatever little hope that we have in our words. Words such as "I don't think I'm ever going to get a job", "I don't think I'll ever find that special someone", "God won't allow it", "It's never going to happen" etc shows hope, but it is all pushed away.Sometimes it is hard to speak words of faith mainly because if what we hope for does not happen, we will look like fools. But what is life without hope? What's the point of living if we don't take that little step of faith and believe that good things do happen to people even though lots of crap happens as well. I love the words in the Bible because it brings me hope. Mark 11:24 says "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."There are many things that my heart desires. Some of it are my hopes and dreams, while others are the dreams of other people that I wish to see come true. Sometimes it is so hard to believe that my prayers will come true, but it is in these times when I try to continue praying anyway. Because He hears me. Even though the plans that I have for my life may not be the same as His, He still hears me, and He knows that I have hope in Him, and He will provide.On another note, I'm really enjoying my holidays now... hehe
freedom bells
I've forgotten how it was like to wake up in the morning, stare out the window, see the sun and the pale blue sky, with white floating clouds, and feel truly, truly happy, knowing that I don't have to go for class, or study for exams, or do assignments.I've forgotten the joy of eating breakfast at my own, slow pace.I've forgotten how it feels to actually NOT wake up for breakfast.I've forgotten the taste of freedom...But now I remember.It's over. It's done. It's accomplished.I've finished my first trisemester of university.Oh yeah, baby.. *dances*
it's not father's day in new zealand
And you'd think the world will standardize Father's Day, like Christmas or Valentine's Day. Apparently Father's Day in New Zealand is in September.Flashbacks...I don't remember the joy on his face on the day that I was born. I don't know about the agony, the pain, (not physical pain or agony, that's for sure. You get what I mean) or the mental torture he went through. I'm his first child. I'm pretty sure he had no clue on how to handle me.But I know he was happy that I was born.I don't remember him waking up during the nights to bottle-feed me. I don't remember him taking me to the parks, or cradling me, or teaching me how to stand, walk, and run. I don't remember him buying the soft toys that I see myself holding in the photographs of my past.But I know he did all of that. And more.I remember him teaching me how to count, how to do multiplications and divisions. I remember him lying next to me in front of the TV with my favourite soft toy in my hand, forcing him to sniff the worn out toy. I remember him at first day of school, and how I tried not to cry when I saw his car leaving the schoolyard. I remember him bringing the family for outings, theme parks, camps and back to Sabah during the holidays.I remember him teaching me maths in class when I was in Form 3. I remember him giving my friends and I additional maths tuition in Form 4 and Form 5. I probably would have failed maths if it weren't for his efforts. I remember him trying his best to handle a growing teenager. He may be a teacher, but handling other people's kids and handling your own are two totally different dimensions.I remember him on the day that I got the scholarship to study overseas. He said he was proud of me. I remember him chauffering me from home to college so that I won't have to suffer using public transport. That's 3 hours of his life, every single week, for one and a half years. I remember him paying for all of my groceries even though I had money of my own. I remember him paying for the medical bills, application fees for visa etc. I remember him driving me to Putrajaya and to Subang Jaya to sort out my university applications with my sponsor and with my education agent. I remember him paying for my new luggage bag, my winter coat, my shoes, and the clothings that I bought.I remember him on the day that I left home. I didn't know how he did manage to let me go, but he did. All my life, he tried to be the best father that he can be by protecting me from the evils of the world, for as long as he could. On that day, he need to let me go and let me face the world alone. And that's what he did. He let me live my life, and he trusted me to make decisions for myself. He may not say what he feels most of the time, but his actions speak louder than his words ever can. He sacrificed everything for the people that he loved most: his family.Both of us may have completely different personalities, and totally constrasting mindsets, but I am what I am today because of him. I'm proud to have him as my dad.Happy father's day!!Sidenote: I can't wait for tomorrow to be done and over with. I'm sick of Info 101. Ah freedom..
bye bye stats
Stats 193 is done and over with.I have mixed feelings about that paper. It was generally okay overall, I guess, but some of the answers don't make sense. For example, how are you suppose to find p-value for 10.38, when the standard normal table has values only up to 3.99? Sigh never mind me.One more..just one more left..Info 101. I've already pass the course but I still need to sit for the exam and try to get an A, or A+, God willing.The exam stress is almost gone.Freedom is drawing nigh.I can hear the sound of the freedom bells. I can feel my spirit starting to soar. I'm going to finish my very first trisemester of university. Just a few more days...My roommate has finished all of her exams and is now having the time of her life. *sigh - envious* She deserves it I guess, studying law ain't easy.Taste and know that freedom is good.Ah..holidays..
elaine's 21st
I remember the first time I met Elaine Vun. It was my first day of orientation and ICF was having their annual 'we-want-more-members-so-come-join-us' booth. I knew Aik Win before I came to Wellington, and he introduced me to Elaine. I really didn't know what to say to her, not only because I didnt know her, but maybe partly because I was shy (a characteristic now long-gone and will only surface when cute and handsome guys are within eye range). After ICF was done with the booth at the end of the day she gave me a piece of leftover cake.It was after ICF's drag netting when I got to know her better. We were having dinner at someone's house (I've forgotten the name of the lady who owns the house, sorry) and she got really excited when I told her that I was born in Sabah, and I'm half Kadazan, which means the bulk of my family is in Sabah. Elaine was born in K.L. but grew up in Sabah. I was born in Sabah but grew up in the Peninsular. We were opposites. She got excited because someone finally understood what she was talking about when she mentioned places in Sabah and things that are uniquely Sabahan.We became really good friends after that.We studied together in the library. She sleeps over at my room occasionally. We had girls' night out together. We split the cost of the entertainment book so that we can eat at fancy restaurants at great discounted prices. We talked, laughed, shared our joys, sorrows and most of all, our exam stress. She does funny stuff like asking me to check her assignments. She is doing a teaching degree and I'm a commerce student. There's absolutely no relation between the two except that it's both taught in English. And she asked me to check her grammar. Hahaha... I found it hilarious.She was my alarm clock during Easter Camp. We slept side-by-side in the marae. She visits this blog frequently and keep pestering me to update it.She's one of my closest friend since I came here, and even though it's been only a few months, I feel like I've known her for years and years. And for that I will be forever grateful to her. She's friendly, sweet, charming and absolutely lovely. I believe that each one of us gives out a certain 'vibe'. You can sense that vibe when you meet the person. For example, there are some people that makes you laugh, and you feel like hugging them when you see them. There are some people that makes you force out a smile and a 'hi', but you really don't want to talk to them. It's all a farce. There are some people that you don't want to see for the rest of your entire life. If you do meet them, you'll feel like punching them in the face. *Love your enemies.. arrgghh*But for Elaine, you can't help but like her, hug her, and laugh at her at times. I guess everybody agrees with me on this.She turns 21 this month.Happy birthday Elaine. =) This post is for you.Sidenote: Economics is done and over with. I have two more exams: Stats and Infomation Management. Sighz...
fcom 110
I had my first major test today. It was a 30% test. The course was FCOM 110 (New Zealand Commercial Environment).I have 3 other major exams coming up, but I was more worried about this test compared to the other subjects. That is because there is so much to study for this course, too much readings to do and I wasn't really sure how to go about studying it.The lecturers were kind enough to tell us to a certain degree what topics will be tested on. The first questions was on IT, the second was public policy. Those two questions were kinda expected, so I was prepared for it.But not for the third question.Black Magic - Your InsightThe question is suppose to be a management question. What the question meant by 'Black Magic' is how David can beat Goliath, or rather, how a small country like New Zealand (and hence, David) can take on the world (and hence, Goliath) in the world of business.Instructions:1. Do not write an essay.2. Do not regurgitate lecture materials. It is your insights that are important.I just wrote down everything that came into my mind. Things such as critical thinking, constant innovation, passion, drive, etc came into my mind. But all these things were covered in lectures, so I'm not sure what he meant by 'do not regurgitate' because I'm pretty sure all the students would've wrote the same things.Overall, I thank God for helping me through. FCOM is finally done and over with.And now I have 3 more papers. Yippee.And then I'm free.Counting down..4..3..
